According to NY1, New York State’s highest court began hearing a case today as to whether or not same-sex couples can get hitched in our great city.

And whodathunkit? Bloomberg’s all for it. If the court rules in favor of same-sex marriages in the state, he says he’ll allow it in the city, and that even if the court rules against, he’ll work with the State Legislature to try to get ’em to change their minds.

Right now Massachusetts is the only state to recognize same-sex marriage, while others – California, Connecticut, D.C., Hawaii, Maine, New Jersey (props to my homestate) and Vermont – give those in same-sex unions a legal status that’s similar to that of married folks.

Why not grant gays the right to marry? If men and woman who don’t even frigging know each other can get married (see Britney Spears and Jennifer Lopez – not to each other of course though that’d be hot), why not two men or two women in a long term committed relationship? Ah, the mysteries of closed-mindedness.

I’m sure a bunch of you have been to this place already but if you haven’t, get your asses over there.

I was out in Williamsburg on Sunday for my friends Needled party at Tattoo Culture to “celebrate the anniversary of tattoo couture — one year of Needled posts on the art and culture of tattoos peppered with the occasional pin-up to keep your attention.” (direct quote from Marisa DiMattia – Needled editor) Support the arts people, read this site often.

After the party, we continued the celebration at the Tainted Lady Lounge. I’m not sure what it’s like the other days of the week, but Sunday’s are a BLAST! They have a weekly costume party, fun cocktails that pay tribute to sassy tainted ladies, bar tenders that jump on the bar to shake what their mamma’s gave ’em, and the best music that’ll get ANYONE up off their ass. You know what else they have? A masseuse – a CUTE masseuse that gives free massages. Yes, FREE. Just tip him well because it’s well worth it and he’s a recent graduate that’s getting his practice in.

Why oh why is Williamsburg so far from the UES. Then again, a lot of the fun places are far from the UES.

(image courtesy of Taser International)

Is it really illegal to walk around with a Taser, because if it’s not, I’m going to start carrying one… and using it.

While out with the girls over the weekend, I left them somewhere on Essex and headed towards Allen to catch the bus. It was around 1am (not so late for a Saturday) and these 2 guys spotted me from a half a block away. When they got closer, I knew they were going to make some kind of comment, but they said more than I expected. They asked me if I was lost – I didn’t answer. They asked again – I didn’t answer. They actually followed me and one started talking about all the graphic shit he was going to do to me. Asshole. It took everything I had to not to turn around and start pounding them. WTF?!?! I still can’t get over that. I was about a foot taller than they were, and of all the people on the street (lots of drunk little girls with hardly ANY clothes on), they decide to start with the scary tall chick that would have loved nothing more than to kick their sorry asses all over the LES. BUT, I stayed calm and instead of turning around, I just opened up my knife enough for them to see, and they backed off. THEN, to make matters worse, two other guys started in. They kept saying over and over that I shouldn’t be walking in that neighborhood alone. Are you kidding me?? Since when?? So, I guess guys have gone from cat calling to threatening.

Someone please tell me what we need to do to these idiots to get them to stop. There is no reason why I should suddenly not feel safe and secure in my city. I’ve been here for YEARS and this is the first time I was threatened.

Any suggestions that won’t put me in jail?

Sitting on my fire escape this morning I noticed an unusual amount of people walking down Flatbush towards the Atlantic/Pacific stop. Then several ladder trucks come howling up the street. I see flashing lights and trucks parked around the 7th Avenue stop on the Q/B. Guess there was a fire in the station or something.

Some of those people did not look pleased.

In honor of Asian Pacific American Heritage Month, I’ve been exploring Asian snack food. I last wrote about the weird Japanese eats you can find at a variety of Asian convenience stores. Now it’s time for weird Chinese munchies.
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Memorial Day weekend is a great time to enjoy NYC, as most of the natives leave for the weekend. Now’s a good time to go to that restaurant you can never get a seat at or that bar that’s always so uncomfortably packed. Case in point, we had the Silver Swan pretty much to ourselves on Saturday night, which allowed us to privately gorge on german sausage, red cabbage and lambic–yum!. The other side of their funny bar sign after the jump…
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There is indeed a farm in the city and, as with many of the city’s most awesome things, it’s located in Queens. Queens County Farm was built in 1697 and, according to its Web site, is the only working historical farm in the city (unless you count my landlords’ apartment when their extended family comes to visit, ha!). Admission is free, and you can take a tour of a historical farmhouse, feed some greedy barnyard animals your hand (or buy some feed first at the gift shop) and take a hayride.

Here is an example of the pupil dilation-inducing cuties you can expect to encounter during a couple hours at the farm:

Awwwwww!

All, in all, much better than the new Apple Store:

Booooooring!

I rode my bicycle from 8th avenue and 10th street to Flatbush Avenue and like I don’t know what and back. Tons of fun. I went to a bbq in Park Slope; the only neighborhood in Brooklyn that doesn’t make me feel awkward, and rode my host’s bicycle for a short but very enjoyable period of time. I don’t know what it is about that neighborhood, it’s not Jennifer Connely and her albino priest playing husband or Gwyneth Paltrow and Apple (do they live there too? I forget). It’s because of the tiny retailers and tons of coffee and organic food places and because Prospect Park is a block away. Also for the fact that cars drive there at 5 mph. For a guy who hates Brooklyn, I really seem to be loving Park Slope. M’eh, Queens is still better.

The sign supposedly read “Do Not Enter” but it was placed in such a way that even the most intelligent and cautious of drivers would not have entered. So what was the result? A $50 ticket from the NYC Parks Department representatives (jackasses) for going in an authorized only area at Flushing Meadows Corona Park. Not only is this park the most confusing to get to by car, it also happens to be one of the least appealing. The reason I went? Some of my family members are attached to it in a sentimental way…that’s pretty much all that can be said about that.

The barely surpassing toy-cop duo stopped me in my driving tracks and informed me that I had committed a violation. . . along with 4 other cars that were stopped AND one that passed all of us by without being ticketed. That just passed by!

And after all of this, the “cop” actually LET ME GO THROUGH IN THE DIRECTION HE HAD TICKETED ME FOR. Have you ever been stopped at a red light only to be encouraged to do it again?

Are you effing kidding me? Goddamned asshole bitchass f****g f***s. ARGH. NOT GUILTY on all f***ing counts.

Okay, I have to throw this out there…

Really, now, who’s bright idea was it to have low flying jets buzz Manhattan. Wasn’t there one person in the room who might have raised his hand and said, “The Blue Angels? Flying over Manhattan? Really? No…no…I love the Blue Angels…those barrel rolls are really cool, but Manhattan, flying low? Really? No…of course not. No reason New Yorkers might get freaked seeing planes flying around Manhattan…sorry…Coffee anyone?”

No one really announced it, or made that big of a deal about it in advance, so a bunch of planes flew low right by Manhattan, cruising along the Hudson, buzzing the tower as it were, and sending neigh on a thousand people scrambling to call 311 as they checked to see if they had three gallons of water in the refridgerator.

Of course, the Air and Space museum responded with respect and concern: “It’s just Fleet Week. Everyone knows it’s fleet week.”

Yes everyone know’s it’s Fleet Week. That’s why all the women I know are busting out the high heels and trim little tank tops that have been waiting ever so patiently in the back of their dressers, and I will be using this long weekend to finally get my taxes done. (Those don’t need to be for a few days, right?)

But…Fleet. Not Squadron Week.

If there were boats flying low over Manhattan no one would have had a problem.