A car equipped with a PA system just drove by my building, with a man inside announcing that Jesus is going to come tomorrow and end it all, or something.

I’m sure he’ll appreciate the millions of intoxicated New Yorkers who will all try to make a pass at him.

“Hey, Jesus, come here often?”

“Oh, uh, you know…every couple thousand years or so.”

“Sweet! Look at my boobs, buy me a shot!”

“Seen ’em.“