My Pride: Going Once, Going Twice, Sold.

I’ve recently agreed to take part in a charity bachelor auction a friend is putting on for her boss. A little too Saved By the Bell/90210/O.C. for my taste, but any opportunity where I can address a large crowd with a mic from a bully pulpit I’ll not-so-reluctantly oblige. I don’t anticipate pulling down any kind of significant bid, but free liquor is free liqour. (And there’s that whole charity thing too). My self-evaluated sticker price sits comfortably at $2.35 (for everything you see here). I have no idea what it’s gonna be like, but I do know that one of the following NYC personalities will be there. For those of you who will be in attendance please take note so you may bid accordingly:

Occupation: Investment Banker, Hedge Fund Manager, Broker, etc.
Income: $150-350K
Interests: Money, Anal Sex.
Favorite Music: Billy Joel
Favorite Movie: Wall Street
Motto: “i-Bank, therefore I am”

Occupation: Photographer/Dilettante
Income: Undisclosed Trust Fund
Interests: They change every week. This week, homosexuality and homemade pasta.
Favorite Music: What’s that one band called from the UK? Yeah, yeah that one. They’re awesome.
Favorite Movie: Anything by Truffaut or Goddard. I can’t recall the actual titles movies off the top of my head though.
Motto: “What the fuck is breakfast? It’s called brunch. Loser.”

Occupation: W.A.M. (Waiter.Actor.Model)
Income: $25K, but something is gonna happen soon.
Interests: Making it, making it big, dating Kimberly Stewart.
Favorite Music: You’ve probably never heard of them. Oh, and Radiohead.
Favorite Movie: It’s called “The Bar” a movie my and I buddy wrote about our lives as bartenders trying to make it as actors. Darren Aaronofsky’s niece really liked it.
Motto: “I think I’d make a really good Survivor because…”

Full report to follow the event.

6 Comments so far

  1. lisa (unregistered) on February 21st, 2006 @ 6:57 pm

    i thought charity bachelor auctions only existed on bad sitcoms! i had no idea they happened in real life!

  2. celebutante (unregistered) on February 21st, 2006 @ 6:59 pm

    I’d pay for a night with you. Where do I sign up for this event?

  3. Stella (unregistered) on February 21st, 2006 @ 7:19 pm

    That’s so awesome! Too bad I can’t pimp out some of my co-workers. Wait, maybe I still can… ;)

    Good Luck Michael! Hope you win a great date!!!

  4. Ian Canino (unregistered) on February 21st, 2006 @ 8:45 pm

    I concur with Lisa.. Had no idea that these events are actually hosted here in NYC. Speaking of dating, has anyone here tried speed dating or magic match? I haven’t tried any of them but would love to hear from people who has.

    Michael, good luck on the auction tonight and can’t wait to hear the post-op!

  5. Michael Orell (unregistered) on February 22nd, 2006 @ 11:03 am

    I hope for the sake of our readers I win a bad date. What’s better – “we had a great time, made out like teenagers with hands down eachothers pants” or “she started sobbing uncontrollably when I asked her why she brought her dog to dinner”

  6. Karlik1 (unregistered) on March 3rd, 2006 @ 4:28 pm


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