A vegan ice cream shop owner just had his bike stolen last week. Then he found the same bike a few blocks away chained to a post. The cops told him that if it was his, he could clip it and then he did. Just a few more days later, he parked the bike outside (where it was initially stolen from) and found the perp trying to re-steal the bike claiming that it was his own. But thieves are often liars too and the bike is, for now, safe.

Why is thievery on the rise? Is it due to the weakened economy? What the hell is going on here people? Is Bloomberg’s third term going to help? Damn you thieves and your lying.