Archive for November, 2004

Holiday Give Away

In the spirit of the Holidays and my girl Nora, fellow NYC metroblogger, I am offering up the following items that i found while cleaning out my apartment to those in need.

1) Pile of meat.

2) 1995 ZAGATs

Paper lanterns, wooden swords and impractical clutch purses

Paper lanterns, wooden swords, and impractical clutch purses* are just a few of the modestly priced Chinese goods you’ll find at Pearl River Mart, an emporium formerly of Chinatown, now housed on the west side of Broadway between Broome and Grand. They’ve got mandarin tops, bamboo furniture, teapots, chopsticks, jade trinkets, origami paper and many, many decorative geegaws. I am told that it was dirt cheap at its former location (down a covered alley in a no-frills warehouse off Canal St) but I still find it very wallet-friendly. Plus, the Chinese know how to wrap a present: their many-colored sachets, cloth boxes, and papers are a great way to transform stocking-stuffer-level presents into real under-tree dynamite. Last year I wrote boyfriend coupons, e.g., a kiss, a long walk, a long kiss, on origami paper, folded them into roses and dropped them in little sachets, which I then used to fill the Korean chest I’d gotten for my girlfriend. In other words, a little imagination and a few inexpensive items from Pearl River can help you find something new for the man/woman who has everything. Their little tea gallery is a great place to take a load off when you’ve been tramping all over SoHo, too. Oh and lah dee dah, they even have a website now.

Now, granted, you might be able to find many of these items for a buck or two cheaper in a hole in the wall on Canal St, but is it really worth exposing yourself to such madness? Not to this father’s son.

(Challenge accepted, Nora!)

* Though that would seem to imply that other clutch purses are practical: a dubious proposition.

CIRHOSSIS AND CRABS IN THE NAME OF GOD AND COUNTRY

Please, just read this:

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/11/28/arts/28rich.html?pagewanted=3&oref=login

The last line is especially true. We have to show the moral crusaders and their scarlet letters that they do not in fact own, run, or represent this country. My drinking and deviant sex binges can only do so much for America, people.

the most wonderful time of the year

Now that Thanksgiving is behind us, I

Man plunges to his death from Empire State Building

empirestate.jpgAn unidentified man apparently committed suicide on Friday by jumping from the 86th floor observation deck of the Empire State Building after scaling the tall, spiked security fence that is supposed to prevent such acts. His body was found on the 6th floor landing.

Once again proving that no many how many barriers you put in someone’s way, if they are determined enough, there is no stopping them.

I don’t mean to detract from the tragedy of any loss of human life – it’s a tragedy for his family and friends, assuming he had any of either, and my heart goes out to them – but I still firmly believe that suicide is one of the greatest acts of cowardice a person can commit.

uh, happy thanksgiving?

IMG_0860.gif
I woke up to see this out my window. Living in a city like NY, where terrorist attacks are always in the back of your mind, I was sure something catastrophic had happened. Luckily it was just a passing storm. I don’t think the photo does it justice but it really was an amazing sight. The sky below the black clowds was bright blue. The cloud pattern just didn’t match the serenity below it.

Happy Thanksgiving

The 78th annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade kicks off at 9am today, marching from W. 77th St, around Columbus Circle and continuing down Broadway to – you guessed it – Macy’s flagship store at Herald Square.

This year we’ll meet a balloonified SpongeBob SquarePants for the first time, as well as a handful of air-infused M&Ms.

Have a pleasant day, however and with whomever you spend it – and try to be thankful for something, even if it’s just for spite.

Gobble gobble.

Something Tells Me Halliburton Will Be Directing

Let me get this straight: days after the 2004 intelligence reform bill turned information-gathering agencies into theory-supporting institutions, I now find out that we’ll be subjected to public service announcements about terrorism. That Bush administration – just not that subtle, are they? It would be nice if they went to the effort of linking cause and effect in all their policies, wouldn’t it? For example: “President Bush is proud that his new environmental bill was passed this afternoon. Oh, by the way, leading experts predict cancer rates to rise by 600% in the next two years.” Or, down the road: “The Bush family congratulates Jeb on his election to the office of President. At this time, all citizens are asked to please grab their ankles and prepare for penetration.”

The new MoMA now open on W. 53rd St.

I was one of the many who braved the rain yesterday to welcome MoMA back to where it belongs… Manhattan.

The line wrapped around the block throughout the day and night but the crowd inside, although damp, seemed to agree it was worth the wait. And more than worth the price of admission, which yesterday was free! The new facility, by Japanese architect Yoshio Taniguchi, is breathtaking – inside and out.

Never having taken any art history classes, it’s difficult for me to appreciate some of the more traditional works of art on display. Art, for me, is like wine. I know what I like, but I can’t really tell you why. That’s probably why I enjoy the Architecture and Design and the Photography Collections more than anything. Since many of the items and subjects of these collections are familiar to me, I appreciate them more.

Don’t wait to go check it out for yourself. There really is something for everyone there.

The Museum of Modern Art is located at 11 West 53 Street.

Hours are:
Saturday 10:30 a.m.

“That’s HOT!” No, It Isn’t – Shut The Hell Up Already

So, I’m on the subway this morning and I look up to see an advertisment that says something to the effect of: “Johnny looks hot in a snowboard sweater with etc. etc….” All well and good except that the “Johnny” in question was no more than 6 years old. I’m sorry, I’m really sorry but as ubiquitous as the word “hot” has become post-the Simple Life, unless you have a serious Humbert Humbert complex IT DOES NOT DESCRIBE A SIX-YEAR-OLD. This is the path advertising is taking us down – making everything okay for adults okay for kids. This is why I see 10-year-old girls in midriff-baring shirts and hooker make-up, and why I carry an eye dropper full of bleach to burn the image from my eyes after I’m done vomiting. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m anything but prude, but please, let kids be kids. If this keeps up, instead of saying “Oh, your baby looks so cute,” we’ll have “Oh god, that’s such a HOT baby!” Do we want that? Is that what we want? Because you know where that will lead, don’t you? That will lead to inner-womb beauty pageants, where kicking will be considered a talent and mothers will fudge their date of conception to get past the third-trimester cut-off because, you know, second trimester fetuses are so much more svelte than those 7-9 month fatties.

Oh, the company responsible is: www.childrensplace.com

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